11 July 2005

One-hitters: Against the grain version

- It seems like we're supposed to get a kindler, gentler Ron Artest next year. Also, Tom Cruise says he won't attack new mothers with postpartum depression for being pill-popping psycho hose beasts as much.
- College football's Bowl Championship Series unveils a new ranking system after the AP and ESPN take their balls and go home, telling the BCS not to use their polls in determining BCS participants. The new system, sexily named the Harris Interactive College Football Poll, won't rely on dubious preseason rankings in determining BCS slots when it debuts a month in to the season. Unfortunately, we didn't notice the words "tournament" or "playoff" anywhere in the first three paragraphs of this story, so we went back to looking at porn. Nothing weird, though. Strictly hetero stuff.
- Michelle Wie fires a back-nine 41 in the U.S. Amateur Publinx today, falling to the middle of the pack in a bold effort to get an improbable bid to the '06 Masters. We have one question: Is she 18 yet?
- "Ol' One-Nut" Lance Armstrong hits the mountain stages in the Tour de France, holding a slim lead heading into what has traditionally been his strongest segment of the race. The start of the next stage apparently had to be moved to prevent some wacky French farmers from blocking the race in protest of wolves attacking their sheep and cows. So then, who exactly are they protesting to? The wolves? Good luck with all of that. We've heard wolves don't take too kindly to civil disobedience.

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